There wasn’t a dry eye in the house on May 17th as 10 Monarch Students were honored with awards, shared gifts to the community, and received their diplomas! We also were pleased to honor John Elder Robison, friend of Monarch and author of the best seller, “Look Me in the Eye” with an honorary diploma. You can read John’s blog account of the graduation by clicking here.

Dr. Neal, Challenger Program Director, delivered the following address to the graduates and the Monarch community:

“It is good that we are here to witness, share and celebrate. We witness today not just a graduation, but the culmination of efforts and sacrifice and competence that this graduation represents. It is the work of the parents, grandparents, faculty, Board members, institutional and health supporters, siblings, and so many friends that we celebrate – congratulations for all you have done to bring this day from possibility to reality.

Some possible first lines for graduation addresses:

Once upon a time, in a mythical office park just off I -10…

One score (twenty years) ago, your parents conceived you in hopes of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness…

We first noticed the bat swooping in Ms. Benita’s room…

It was time to kidnap the seniors (again)…

I remember when I was like that ….

And some possible graduation address questions:

Whose job is this anyway?

What has this got to do with me?

Why do you expect of me?

What did this all mean?

Why?

At Monarch we can sometimes lose track of the “why” of certain occurrences and rituals. You know there is a reason, but it isn’t immediately obvious. Even more confusing, the first reason you might think why something is set up the way it is usually is not, might be the exact opposite of the real one.

It’s easiest to start with a story. There have been a curious number of senior kidnappings this year. After the MMM breakfast, the Monarch bus carrying the seniors was diverted to deliver food from the breakfast to Casa Juan Diego – and then on to a huge second breakfast for the seniors themselves. The seniors disappeared for a few hours during winter intersession to go sit on the patio of the new Starbuck’s – thinking about the holidays to come, and about being ready to graduate. One afternoon in February, we held them after school. They thought they were in trouble. But we instead used the getaway bus to go see a foreign language film called Percepolis about a young woman growing up in post-Revolutionary Iran and then we helped open Gigi Huang’s fantastic Bistro. Somewhere in there, NECCO wafers started flying through the air. What were these kidnappings trying to teach you?

Your kidnappers did not wear masks or attempt in any way to remain unknown. Each time, we always used the same well marked vehicle –broad daylight - The Monarch School. We never went into hiding. Rather than taking you away from the world, to keep you to ourselves for our own gain, we always took you out into the world, for your gain, for your nourishment. We kidnapped you from the cocoon of being a child and a student, and took you out into the world. We asked and expected the world to see and celebrate you spreading your wings. We were proud to be with you, proud and happy to be seen with you. This is sort of reverse, or inverse kidnapping. Transformation in full view!

Your time at Monarch has been filled with many similar, curiously disorienting events. When it was time to pick objectives, you were asked, “Well, what do you want to work on?” When you wondered what courses to take, you were asked, “Well, where are you going next, and what do you need to learn to get there?” Your grade level was related to what you needed to learn next, not what age or grade level you were “supposed” to be at. Yesterday at community meeting time, you honored all the teachers whom you knew had been mean to you! You were given work, and sometimes not told how to do it, but had to learn how to ask for help. Teachers expected more from you than you thought you could or should give! You were even expected to build both a transcript and a resume, using the Life academy as a launching pad for your future usefulness.

If you wanted something, like a dance, free lunch, a senior trip, you did the planning and coordinating to get them done. Rather than just noticing something was wrong, and then telling an adult, you were expected to notice, step forward, and own the problem and be part of the solution. As far as senior skip day is concerned, you still haven’t figured out how to get that done, so you haven’t had one!

Community service always came before community fun. Care came before content. You not only attended and represented yourselves admirably at many events such as the Women’s Energy Network, the Monarch breakfast, and the Lemonade day entrepreneurship training, but you did the backstage planning and support work to make those events happen for other Houston citizens.

And when we celebrated, you learned to include everyone, notice others, make sure that a dance or a trip or a community celebration was open for everyone, like the happy, joyous time we shared recently at the prom. When it was time to break ground for the new campus, you attended, not as passive observers and recipients of the marvelous generosity which will bring Monarch to a new home. You worked to supply and demonstrate the activities that showed how that new campus will be brought to life. As much has been given, so much also is expected.

Today, the focus of our celebration is one of equal and curious delightful balance. Monarch gives you a diploma that you have earned, through your own actions. You give Monarch gifts, in expression of gratitude for achieving what you could not have done alone. We look around and see John Elder Robison, notice he did not have this opportunity, and include him in our circle of celebration – to right a wrong and communicate the possibility that it could have been different, must be different, that we all have to have a place. Back and forth, strange inversions – it wasn’t us – it was you. It isn’t about you. It’s about we. You are big and strong. You are only strong enough with others.

In the end, why did this all happen? What were your parents, the faculty, the institution builders hoping you would come to experience, practice, know and own? It’s really pretty simple. Why we did this:

Why? So that you could find yourself - Learn, grow, respect, challenge, accept others, advocate for self, celebrate that you are who you are – a complex collection of strengths and vulnerabilities. Respect your talents – use them. You won’t find yourself just by thinking or just by taking it all in, but rather by doing. Don’t use your knowledge of your weaknesses to avoid getting on with life.

Why? So that you could find others – coordinate, empathize, share, join, communicate, be curious how others cope, suffer, celebrate, and join the coping, suffering, celebrating. Make no room for hate. Don’t allow your strengths to wall you off from others who don’t have the same set of strengths.

Why? So that you would find your place in the world – act, serve, join, do something, be competent, lead, work, contribute. When you are lost and bored, do something in the world. “Be the change that you want to see in the world.”

Why? So that you would give peace and reason a chance – mediate, restitute, use your best EF skills, trust to problem solving, repair, repair, repair, have fun, make a place for everyone, respect the world. This isn’t about competition, and it isn’t about pleasure and comfort. “Don’t surround yourself with yourself.”

Why? So that you will know that you are loved. Receive help, accept feedback, accept challenge, and receive our admiration, our trust, and our profound delight in your existence. Love is the best answer to WHY.